Yesterday the first rain drop descended from the sky (after
all, it IS fall), and just like that, a rash of traffic accidents began in Los
Angeles. Oh, did you not know this fun
fact? NO ONE IN L.A. KNOWS HOW TO DRIVE
IN THE RAIN. For some reason, the moment
the streets are wet, it’s like a signal for everyone to crash into each
other.
This is no lie—on the news last night (as we were flipping
from “The Daily Show” to a DVR’d version of “Bored to Death,” just to emphasize
that we don’t actually sit around watching the news), they were reporting that
since the rain started, there had been 725 additional traffic accidents around
the Los Angeles area.
So, it’s not racist, or sexist, or city-ist, or whatever you
might want to call it. Drivers in Los
Angeles really ARE stupid when it rains.
I’m not exactly why this is, aside from the possibility that your brain
just gets lazy from all the nice weather, and when there’s an actual reason to
be careful, the brain is all “wait a second, I can’t switch gears that fast,
man”—and then you’ve rear-ended someone because the slight change in temperature
and weather condition has caused you to lose your head and slam on your brakes
for no reason. Look out! Water falling from the sky!
I happen to like the rain (I know, Brandi, I am the only
one), and I am a conservative driver anyway, so I don’t have this problem, but
I will tell you it took me a whole hour to get to Costco last night, during
which time I witnessed two rain-related accidents where the people involved in
them kind of just sighed and pulled over like “Yeah……what are you gonna do?”