Bad Hair, Cabo Cantina Style
Over the weekend Stephan and I decided that we hadn't seen enough complete weirdos during the week, so we took a trip down to the Santa Monica Promenade, where every meal is served with a side of freaks. We're used to living in San Francisco and New York, you see, so sometimes we haven't had our quota and we start jonsing for people with super-long fingernails talking to themselves about Canada, or people roller skating for no reason.
Maybe it's because we intended so go out and see something odd, but we didn't even make it off our street before we saw a guy with a ponytail so wrong, we had to stake him out private detective style to try to get a photo that accurately depicted how stupid he looked.
You see, Stephan (in case you don't know) is LOSING HIS HAIR and has been for some time. Actually, it seems to me like he's done losing it, that it's in a male pattern baldness holding pattern (so to speak), and he's not bald– just hair challenged. Besides, Stephan (in case you don't know) looks GOOD, hair or no, whether he shaves his head or not. He even has a cortisone-withdrawal rash on his face right now, and he is even making that look good. So, there you go. I'm saying, he looks better than alot of guys who have all of their hair, so he doesn't need to sweat it.
However, Stephan has a thing about guys who have hair and make bad choices with it. He's angry about it, and it makes him want to hit. Seeing bad hair like this sends him into a seethe, where he shakes his head alot and says "That f#$cker– has hair, does THAT with it…..did that on PURPOSE to his hair, and is now going to Cabo Cantina to see if it will get him LAID…..so wrong…."
After the bad hair stake-out, we ventured down to Big Dean's for some burgers, where we were treated to a guy talking REALLY LOUD ABOUT CLAM CHOWDER, then to Mr. Marcel's for dessert, where we saw a dude in full Renaissance garb (who I do not believe was in a play or on the way to Ren Faire) talking on an iPhone. By that time my phone's battery was already dead from all the photos I took on the Hair Stakeout, but I'll just let you use your imagination. We also saw a woman running like a Muppet (who wasn't me), and a young kid who was totally shredding the electric guitar but who was probably 13, so it sounded so weird for him to be singing lyrics that clearly belied his lack of life experience. I think at one point we were like "Why is he singing 'Sweet Child O'Mine?"
Oh! Speaking of bad hair, I must bring this website to your attention and give special thanks to Lisa for telling me about it. Because darn IT, that is some bad hair and some funny commentary. Enjoy!
I love how I’ve lived here for 5 years and I still never know what you’re talking about on the Promenade. In fact, in my mind, Big Dean’s is still a super secret restaurant UNDERNEATH the promenade (from that birthday invitation I misunderstood a while back). And Mr. Marcel’s? What?
Maybe it’s because I hate the Promenade and try really hard to forget it.
In other news, I was actually on 3rd Prom the other day and my friend and I were looking for a place to eat and some sort of Santa Monica official suggested Cabo Cantina and I said, “Um, thanks, but I’d rather poke my eyes out with forks than go to Cabo Cantina.” He didn’t get it though, which makes me sad, because that means he considers Cabo a real, herpes-free restaurant. Which it isn’t.