Hey, Guess What?
I have the flu. The flu! How on earth?
As it turns out, even if you’re obsessive about getting the flu shot, you can still get the flu! A doctor told me today that the shot is only 80% effective, and since you know I’m a SUPER overachiever and I always defy the odds, I decided to just go ahead and be one of those statistics. In fact, I’ve had it since Saturday, and am now on DAY FIVE of an absolute high-fever extravaganza. Yes, I went to a doctor (two, actually), one of whom determined I have “Influenza Type B” in blatant defiance of my flu shot. And hey, do you know how he determined that?
Nasal swab. Like, old-school “test the employees at NBC for anthrax right after 9/11” nasal swab. The kind that, even if you’re HEALTHY, is not pleasant. After the test came back positive, the doctor was like “isn’t it cool that we know why you feel so lousy?” And I swear it was only my constant elevated temperature and lack of energy that kept me from punching him in the face. The night before last, my fever was so high, I slept for TWO HOURS, leaving me ample time to sit up and ponder– why, when your body needs sleep the most, does it prevent you from doing that very thing? Also, I watched a bunch of episodes of CSI online, so that was fun.
I’m just posting this in case you happen to be one of the people who already know I’m sick, so when these blog posts keep going up, you don’t think I’m faking my illness and writing anyway. I am so beyond not doing that. These posts were mostly all written over the weekend, when I was about 125% less sick than I am now, in the days that I am fondly referring to as “When I Could Get Out of Bed,” or “When I Could Go Downstairs Without Getting Winded Like a Ninety Year Old.”
Once again, special thanks go out to my sweet husband, who is taking good care of me even though he has germaphobia and I know it’s hard for him. Big props!