BY LORI CULWELL
Yes, I’m referencing a Monty Python sketch in the title,
because that’s what I feel my Google Authorship experience (and my day in general) is quickly devolving
into. Back in February, you’ll recall, a
smart friend told me that I should verify my Authorship through Google, that
this was very important, and that the whole process had taken her approximately
four weeks so I’d better get right on that.
I agreed, and put the steps in motion that very day, in
fact. I’m the kind of person that does
things! I don’t let moss gather,
man! I take action, and then when
nothing happens, I feel like punching the face of the internet.
This is one of the sometimes-unspoken perils of being an action-taker. When you take a bunch of action, then things like this Google Authorship thing DON’T happen, seemingly without
reason, you can easily go over the precipice of being maudlin and filled with
existential angst and notice other places where you've put a bunch of action, only to be repeatedly thwarted (like how we've been trying to get a new dog with no success, or….well, just a bunch of other things).
In case you’re just joining this discussion, Google
Authorship is when your little picture shows up next to your name when someone
Googles you and stuff you’ve written shows up.
So far, in pursuit of the (elusive) Google Authorship status, I have
linked my Google Plus profile to my website and my blog (and vice versa), have
verified ownership of both the domain and the email that goes with it, have submitted
(and re-submitted) the domain, have written “by Lori Culwell” on more pieces of
content than I would care to admit, and even posted a message in this forum
about what, if anything, I could possibly be missing.
This is mysterious to me.
Google knows who I am, and readily serves up all of my writing, my
Huffington Post byline, and my Amazon Author Central listing with all of my
books. I don’t know how I can verify my
Lori Culwell-ness anymore than I already have, and yet, here I am, eight weeks
later, still waiting, staring at code until my head falls off. I’m not sure if I can adequately express my
frustration, except to say that I’m glad to be an example to get you motivated
to start the process, because your Journey to Authorship might (like mine) be a
long one, and I want to give you something to look back on when you’re ready to
bang your head on your desk and tell you
that this kind of thing can absolutely ruin your day, and that I understand. There is no one at Google for me to email for
help (of course), I think I might be waiting for something that is never going
to happen, and of course I am now extending this into being a metaphor for life
in general. This also extended today into several other areas and ended in tears, and let's just say that Stephan Cox is a very sympathetic person and deserves a large piece of cake.
And….how’s your day going?
