So, my friend Brooke had a baby a week ago Saturday, and I
seriously doubt she is reading this, but if she is, Congratulations
Brooke! Great job!
Anyhoo, I got them a baby gift over the weekend, and
when I put it all together I realized that it really would look better inside a
gift-type box, and because that craft store Michaels is closer to me than CVS
or Target, I figured I would go in there and buy a box and some ribbon, because
IT’S MICHAELS, RIGHT? ISN’T RIBBON WHAT
THEY DO? ISN’T IT A STORE FULL OF
RIBBON?
Um, yeah—I’m sure it’s become glaringly obvious now that I
have never been into a Michaels, and, to be honest, even though I went there
and finally did manage to find some ribbon, I’m still not sure what
it is they’re selling in there. I’m not
crafty, not a crafter, don’t do crafts, don’t know what crafting really is, don’t
really care for clutter all that much, am much more of a minimalist, get much
more into technology and make photo albums on the internets, ok?
So–Michaels—wow. I didn’t
even know they made that many different types of fake flowers. And, what is that green stuff they put the flowers in? Why would you not just put those fake flowers in a vase? Or, why would you buy fake flowers to begin with? Literally, there were things in that store
that were parts of craft projects that I didn’t even know existed, and that I
still don’t want to know about now. I’m
pretty sure if you want to build one of those boats that goes inexplicably
inside a bottle, Michaels is your store.
There also seemed to be a lot of beads in there, for strategic beading
purposes.
Anyhoo, I had a hard time telling the difference between
people who worked there and people who were just….there, but finally I asked
someone where the gift wrapping section was, and was met with a blank stare
that surprised me so much, I almost laughed out loud. Like, you work at Michaels, isn’t it just
one big gift wrap and crap store? Why is
it so hard to remember where you’ve located the GENERIC gift wrapping stuff?
As it turns out, not so much with the wrapping paper and
gift boxes, that Michaels. Turns out
you can MAKE stuff that you might end up gift wrapping, but apparently you’re
better off going to a whole different store if you already have something that
you want to wrap. I promise you they
have a better selection of gift wrapping stuff at Target, which is where I
ended up going the next day, after I recovered from the complete sensory overload
of Michaels. But, just in case you go
there, they are totally having a sale on yarn.