A Guest Post That Might Offend You.

I would like to apologize in advance to Stephan's grandma and anyone else who
may be sensitive to adult language.  Because you see, sometimes I put up something like this post where I was giving someone a hard time for a comment that was giving me a hard time, but then I ended up being wrong, they weren't really giving me a hard time, and sometimes the comments from a post like that are so funny and make me laugh so much that I ask one of the commenters to write a guest post.  This is the explanation for what you are about to read.  If you'll recall, this post was referencing the fact that sometimes I write ironic things about products and advertising, and this in turn will cause the Google Ads that you see to the right to generate advertisements for those products, which is unintentional and funny at the same time.  This got my friend Rachel started about Google Ads, and this is the post that resulted.  Again, do not read any further if you are offended by strong language.  Because some strong language is about to start, and I want to make sure you're on board, ok?

And now, I give the microphone over to Rachel, a writer and overall funny person.  You can read more of her funniness over on her blog, especially this post, which is about why you should proofread your resume and which features my favorite line "You know what makes me want to throw up?  Your resume."

So, apparently saying, “Dick Cheney can
suck my balls” in the comment section will get you a guest blog spot on Funny
Strange. Good to know.

 

Anyhoo,  the previous post, comments, and
subsequent apology post brought up the issue of content-based ads. I’m generally
opposed to being subjected to ads pretty much at any time, but years ago when I
first joined gmail, a friend pointed out that the contents of our emails
dictated the ads that showed up on the side, and this delighted me. Drunk with
the power of controlling the Internet, my friend and I decided to see what crazy
ads we could get to come up. I won’t go through the whole conversation stream,
but in the end we got ads for “delicious tinned haggis,” school lunches, and
buying flasks.

 

That was way back in 2004 though, and I
think we can do better now. I’ve really matured since then, and I think Google
has too. I’m really excited to see what we can do on this larger platform. I
think Lori’s blog is a great place to delve deeper into this issue; to discuss
privacy in the age of the Internet and rampant consumerism in general. So,
without further ado:

 

Anal
beads

Anal
probe

Nannies who
kill

Chlamydia

Chlamydia
outbreak

Chlamydia
pandemic

Chlamydia
pandemic causing little children’s faces to melt off

Halliburton To
Blame for Chlamydia Pandemic

Halliburton CEO
implicated in Chlamydia Pandemic Scandal

Halliburton CEO
spread Chlamydia through improper use of Anal Beads

Halliburton CEO
apologizes to Denmark, Liechtenstein, and Andorra.

Apology not
accepted

Halliburton CEO
missing, rumored to be hiking Appalachian Trail

CEO found dead,
clutching a tube of Summer’s Eve douche, a hot pink Sharpie marker, and a framed
picture of Spencer Pratt

LA Times editor
confused by cub reporters use of redundancy, as Summer’s Eve douche and Spencer
Pratt are the same thing

Spencer Pratt
totally has Chlamydia, or should

 

Well, I think we
all learned a lot about advertising here today. Let’s see what AdSense has to
add to the conversation.

 

For more about Chlamydia, check out
my blog at www.ilikeq.blogspot.com. I haven’t updated in forever, but I
hope to soon.

• Category: Guest Bloggers