BY LORI CULWELL
I don’t know if you keep up with your “celebrities in
trouble with the law” news (otherwise known as TMZ), but I couldn’t help
noticing this weird story last week:
Actor Jason London Arrested in Arizona, Rep Says He Was
Beaten by Police
His mugshot looks awful, I’ll give you that. However, if you read just a few lines into
the story, you’ll discover the disturbing fact that London apparently pooped
(on purpose) in the police car after his supposed beating, and (perhaps even
more disturbing), that Jason London is NOT the London brother that is known for
getting into this kind of trouble. In
fact, the person you’d THINK this would be is Jeremy London, who is famous for
this sort of thing (see reference list below).
In case you’re curious, yes, Jeremy and Jason London are identical
twins, which I always thought was weird, because does Jeremy ever go to an
audition, and the producers are like “That was great—can we cast the less
insane version of you, though?”
Here is a punch list (no pun intended) for the troubled
London brothers, for your reference:
n
Jeremy
London is the London brother who played Griffin on Party of Five. That character also made a lot of boneheaded
decisions, including getting in fights, getting married too young, drinking,
and driving his motorcycle too fast.
n
Jeremy
London is the London brother who was in “7th Heaven.”
n
Jeremy
London is the London brother who claimed that he was kidnapped and forced
to smoke crack, as if he was the only one who saw that episode of “Six Feet
Under.”
n
Jeremy
London is the London brother who was in Celebrity Rehab.
n
Jeremy
London is the London brother who has multiple legal issues and is still
trying to get back custody of his kid after a spousal battery incident and
anger management counseling.
So, you’d think “ok, this is a case of good twin/ evil
twin,” right? You’d think it’s weird
that they have the exact same DNA, but it’s kind of weird that Jeremy got all
the self-destructive addiction genes while his twin escaped unscathed and has
been working as an actor and a producer.
Up until last week, you would have been right about
that. Here are some reference points
about the “Good” London brother, Jason, who suddenly went terribly, terribly wrong:
n
Jason London is the London brother who was in
Dazed and Confused.
n
Jason London is the London brother who has been
keeping a low profile and working consistently since the nineties. OK, he’s never made it as huge as people
might have expected, but he’s been in some episodes of CSI, and even last year,
he was on the new Dallas and on the show Scandal.
n
And yet, mysteriously, it is JASON LONDON who
got into a terrible bar fight, got arrested, crapped in a police car, then
accused the police of beating him.
Wow. This seems to be his first time in trouble with the law, so maybe he was trying to really overdo it to outshine his brother? You know how competitiv twins can be.
In perhaps the most shocking twist of all, last week
happened to be the week that “Troubled London Twin # 1” Jeremy finally got his domestic
abuse charges dismissed, just a few days after his brother’s “Police Car
Pooping” meltdown.
Does this mean that only one of the London brothers can be
acting crazy at a time? Is this actually
a “Parent Trap” situation, where one is posing as the other one for some kind
of benefit? For instance, could that
actually have been Jeremy pooping in the police car, while Jason (the stand-up
twin) was appearing in court to get the abuse charges vacated? I’m just saying, it’s worth a moment of
consideration.
Also, in closing, what on earth? These two don’t just drink and take
drugs. They drink, take drugs, then DO
WEIRD THINGS. Another semi-shocking fact
is that these two apparently don’t get along that well. What the what? Wouldn’t they be the only ones who
understand the other’s weird decisions? I suspect after this “Police Car Pooping” episode, these two
might rediscover their brotherly bond, because who but your twin brother could
bail you out after you did something like that?
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