I know, it’s really unbelievable that I could stop griping about summer for one minute and write something else. I am trying to act like a grownup, ok? I shouldn’t be taking summer so personally, even though it clearly is out to crush my soul with its unrelenting hotness and eternal hours of daylight when it knows I work better at night when it's cold. Here is a photo I took on Friday from the roof garden of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, which I will entitle "The Air Weighs One Thousand Pounds."
Also, I just got an automated email from the “My Fitness Tracker” app that I use to track calories and exercise, letting me know that I haven’t logged in for a week, and I don’t know how to tell it that I had three hamburgers and some CHOWDAH last week, so I am avoiding it. All this time spent inside is turning out to be good in one way, though– I can almost do a whole, Linda Hamilton from T2-style pullup, so by the end of summer, I will be able to beat up people who annoy me.
In an ongoing effort to make things in my life more efficient, I have added a blog to my “Premium Domain Finder” site, where I pick one great domain that you could absolutely add to your website empire every single day, and tell you why it’s good and how to build it. Think of it as your own free mini-course in “how to become an internet mogul with a diversified portfolio.” People have told me they find this service oddly fascinating, if just to see the daily lists of domains that expire to wonder “why would a person register that domain in the first place?” but also because it makes them see the potential business behind every single domain name, to which I reply “Welcome to my brain.”
Also, I decided that I have so very many funny and absurd photos I would like to share, I was holding myself back from putting them up because I didn’t want you to think I was a lazy blog writer who only put photos up, so I set this photo-blog thing up (I will not use the word “phlog,” I don’t care if it’s what the kids are saying). Another advantage to that site is that it is Tumblr-based, which means YOU can also add to it. So, if you see a can of Clamato-flavored beer or a weird sign that inappropriately uses quotation marks, feel free to come over and add it, or just put it into a Facebook album and tag me like you’ve been doing, because you know how much I love occupying that space in your mind.
Finally, I would like to share my very favorite photo from US Weekly this weekend, which was on the “Stars Are Just Like Us!” page. Apparently Nick Nolte loves pool noodles and froyo, people. This photo seems oddly misplaced to me because: a) Nick Nolte is not really a star anymore, b) why is he carrying so many pool noodles? c) I don’t even like pools, so the fact that he’s going to a pool doesn’t really make him “Just like me,” and also d) This photo makes Nick Nolte look kind of homeless, though less so than usual. If you look more closely at the photo you will notice that he also seems to have a purse and a wallet, so cumulatively he really looks like your middle-aged lesbian aunt who is bringing eight pool noodles to your house.
This photo is now proudly being displayed on our refrigerator so we can laugh at it every time we go into the kitchen.
